These women facing unplanned pregnancy

In today’s world, we speak about heroes all the time. When somebody does something unselfish, dangerous and lifesaving, it’s easy to see them in a heroic way, especially when what they did affected you personally. But what if we identified a group of heroes and elevated them to a higher level, which made what they did “elevated?”

My wife, Sherry, and I cautiously followed God’s calling for us to adopt a 10-month-old baby girl from China. We had three biological children already, and together as a family, we walked in faith and added a fourth. Foreign adoptions were new during this time, so as you can imagine, we received all kinds of feedback. Knowing this was God’s choice, we faithfully pressed on. After all, Mia was easy to love. (Note: Sherry and I adopted before Brad and Angelina, so we started the trend.)

Shortly after, we felt called to adopt twin boys from Korea. They suffered from mental delays and at two and a half years old, couldn’t walk or eat solid foods. I can tell you today, those boys taught Sherry and me a lot of what we didn’t know about parenting. We thought we were the “experienced parents,” but we quickly learned otherwise. God doesn’t give you more than you can handle, and this was no exception. By this time, we heard comments like, “they are so blessed to have you as parents,” or “they are so lucky,” or “you both are amazing people for adopting.” We appreciated the kind words, but knew inside we were the blessed ones. God wasn’t finished. We adopted two more children, one from Vietnam (Zane) and another from China (Isabella). Our family was now complete with eight! God finally said, “Eight is enough!”

Over time, Sherry and I recognized that what those biological mothers from all over Asia did was simply remarkable. They were our heroes! All of them risking judgment, ridicule, sorrow and sometimes persecution, chose life for their child whom they knew they couldn’t keep. They all had challenges to face. I guarantee the choice for life was not the easiest of paths. If they followed the majority in Asia, they would have chosen abortion, and our five kids would not be in this world today.

In America, we assume most women would not consider placing their child for adoption because it goes against everything the world believes in, like wealth, success, career, college, your body, greed, selfishness and godlessness. But why did those four mothers in Asia choose life? They were told the same thing. Roughly five babies are placed for adoption out of 1,000 born in the U.S., yet over 3,000 abortions are done daily. Working for Save the Storks, a life-affirming national ministry, I have learned that millions of women and men feel pain and regret from choosing abortion. Some of those are speaking out about the pain it caused them, so that others consider a different choice, which is much needed. But still, millions choose abortion.

What if being so unselfish, so courageous, and yes, so heroic, was celebrated today? As Christians, we often see the sin in other people’s choices yet overlook the sin in our own lives. What if everybody stopped being judgmental and began to love unconditionally? What if we stopped pointing out what was done and began to help them through what could be?

How do we create more heroes today? Allow all women facing an unplanned pregnancy to learn the path for placing their baby through adoption. As a society, show her love and support for her bravery. Elevate those women who stand for adoption to be heroes. And most of all, stop judging them for being afraid of the future.

Parents, be very careful in how you react to your daughter or son being faced with an unplanned pregnancy. Your reaction could lead them to a decision that haunts them the rest of their lives, and damage the relationship you have together, forever! Let’s show unconditional love and support on the path to parenting or adoption. As Jesus said: “Just as I have loved you, you must also love one another.” Let’s love those who need us now and help lead them to be heroes!