Next Monday is Groundhog Day, but it needs updating. No, not because the PETA lunatics want us to replace Punxsutawney Phil with a hologram (see Section 3 below), but because there are other persistent things for which the groundhog indicator could be redeployed. Like ICE protests, because it is the categorical imperative of the Omnicause that protests must go on no matter how cold the weather. Or like Sydney Sweeney. If the groundhog spots Sweeney’s new lingerie line hanging on the Hollywood sign, it means at least six more weeks of Sweeney in the news. As our pal RS says sagely, if Sweeney doesn’t win all the Golden Globes awards, then words have no meaning.
We cover this important ongoing and vital story in memes in Section 3 of today’s TWiP, and if that doesn’t keep you scrolling, we can’t help you. (Actually we can, as we have “Amelia” to cheer us up in Section 1 today. And by the way, when can we get our version of Amelia over here?)
Headlines of the week:
Look, I already liked her. You didn’t need to give me more reasons.
I am certain this is a totally legit vote. Not rigged at all.
On the other hand, what have they done to Star Trek:
I confess, I’d watch this episode. (IYKYK.)
What PETA wants on Monday. Don’t they get tired of embarrassing themselves over and over again?
I have questions.
And let’s bring back a gun-toting dude when we can.
And finally. . . Erika Kirk:
