One of the more remarkable things to come out of President Trump’s new, vigorous enforcement of immigration laws took place in Florida, with the amazingly fast construction of what has become known as the Alligator Alcatraz. This facility is out in the marshes, surrounded by water and, presumably, alligators. President Trump toured the facility with Governor Ron DeSantis, and it is reportedly open for business.
Now, this leads to speculation as to where similar facilities might be located. There are, after all, as many as 20 million people in the country illegally at the moment, and once detained, they have to be housed somewhere until their repatriation flight. White House Deputy Chief of Staff for Policy Stephen Miller, speaking to Fox News’ Laura Ingraham, had a few ideas, but it was Laura Ingraham who suggested a possible facility in Alaska.
Fox News asked Alaska about opening an immigration detention center similar to the one in Florida:
“We don’t have alligators, but we have lots of bears.” 🤣pic.twitter.com/yczq0Perf3
— Breaking911 (@Breaking911) July 2, 2025
The conversation had an interesting side note:
Mr. Miller says: (We) want to go to every Republican state, now of course in a sane country Democrats would do it too, but they love illegals. They hate the Americans. We want every governor of a red state, if you’re watching tonight, pick up the phone, call DHS, work with us, to build facilities in your state so that we can get the illegals out, we can get the criminals out. And also very important, Laura, we need Congress to pass the Big, Beautiful Bill, which contains the funding that ICE desperately needs to carry out the mass deportation agenda.
Laura Ingraham: Now we reached out to other states, Stephen, and a lot of them are open to helping. Alaska told us “we don’t have alligators, we have lots of bears.” However they aren’t aware of any plans for an Alaska version of the “Bear Alcatraz.” So, Stephen, there’s good news there.
Well, could we have such a facility? The Florida one sure went up fast. As you readers might suspect, being situated here in the Great Land myself, I have a few ideas.
See Also: Trump Tours Alligator Alcatraz, Tells Former Foe DeSantis ‘You Will Always Be My Friend’
Have You Ever Heard of Anything More Florida? Sunshine State Breaks Ground on ‘Alligator Alcatraz’
One possibility might not be a Bear Alcatraz, but rather, an Aleutian Alcatraz. We have an archipelago of islands, stretching from the end of the Alaska Peninsula most of the way to Kamchatka, Russia, nearly 1,200 miles. There are 14 large volcanic islands in the chain, and over 50 smaller ones. These islands make up the effective maritime border between the Pacific Ocean and the Bering Sea. Many of these little bits of rock are uninhabited. Why not build a facility there? Escape would be impossible, as these islands are surrounded by the frigid waters of the northern Pacific and the Bering Sea. It would be cold, damp, and unpleasant, but during World War 2, we stationed troops there; if American soldiers can hack the conditions, then Tren de Aragua gangsters have no room to complain. No bears, though, in most of that chain.
Another possibility would be a North Slope Alcatraz. There are bears in that country, but bear in mind (hah) that big apex predators are thin on the ground, more so in that harsh environment. But, again, escape wouldn’t really be an issue; not from a facility that stands near a small airstrip in a howling wilderness, surrounded by tundra. And, again, American oil and gas workers brave those conditions to produce American energy, so, again, the Tren de Aragua and other gang members would have no reason to complain.
These are pipe dreams, of course. Alaska isn’t a practical location for such a facility; even from America’s Left Coast, it’s a long flight up here, and a much longer flight to repatriate the goblins ICE is scooping up. There are far more practical locations, like Florida.
Even so, it’s telling that the Trump administration has made enough progress in dealing with this crisis that administration members, like Stephen Miller, are relaxed enough to joke about it.
What a difference a president makes.
Thanks to President Trump, illegal immigration into our great country has virtually stopped. Despite the radical left’s lies, new legislation wasn’t needed to secure our border, just a new president.
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