Despite the challenges of marriage and motherhood, a new report from the Institute of Family Studies suggests that married mothers are happier than their childless and unmarried counterparts for several reasons, including more regular opportunities for “kissing, hugging and snuggling.”
“Married women are more likely than their unmarried counterparts to report feeling deep connection and meaning in their relationships,” San Diego State University psychology professor Jean Twenge, Brigham Young University professor Jenet Erickson and IFS researchers Wendy Wang and Brad Wilcox conclude in the report released this month titled “In Pursuit: Marriage, Motherhood, and Women’s Well-Being.”
“They are also less likely to be lonely and more likely to receive physical affection — both strong predictors of happiness. Mothers are also more likely to find meaning and purpose in life.”
Even though raising a family comes with many challenges, such as increased stress and reduced personal time, researchers contend that there is “no question that marriage and motherhood are linked to greater female flourishing on many other fronts.”
“Moreover, marriage shapes and magnifies the experience of motherhood,” the researchers wrote.
The findings were derived from responses provided by 3,000 U.S. women, aged 25 to 55, in the Women’s Well-Being Survey conducted by YouGov between March 1 and 12. The data suggests nearly twice as many married mothers, compared to unmarried women without children, reported being “very happy.”
Married women were also more likely than unmarried women to say that life is enjoyable most or all of the time. Some 47% of married mothers and 43% of married childless women say life is enjoyable most or all the time, compared to 40% of unmarried mothers and 34% of unmarried childless women.
Fewer married women experienced constant loneliness when compared to their unmarried counterparts. Only 11% of married mothers and 9% of married women without children reported feeling lonely most or all of the time. Some 23% of unmarried mothers and 20% of unmarried childless women reported feeling that way.
“Contrary to a popular narrative that marriage entails social isolation, these findings show that married women are less lonely. While getting married and having children may mean less time hanging out with friends, marriage and children are also associated with other kinds of social engagement, including volunteer work, church attendance, and community connections,” the researchers note.
The study highlighted the vital role physical touch plays in women’s emotional and social health and how that affection from a spouse and children has been linked to “relaxation, increased trust, greater feelings of safety, and increased emotional resilience in multiple studies.”
“Touch elicits the release of oxytocin in the brain, promoting relaxation and reducing stress, while decreasing the sympathetic nervous system’s stress response. Lack of physical touch has been linked to feelings of loneliness and isolation,” the researchers note.
Approximately 47% of married mothers and 49% of married women without children reported high levels of physical touch in the study. Only 23% of unmarried mothers and 13% of unmarried women without children reported the same.
The data show that 58% of married women with children and 61% of married women without children report often receiving hugs or kisses, while only 36% of unmarried mothers and 18% of unmarried women without children said the same.
“More frequent touch is itself a significant predictor of increased happiness,” researchers note. “Only 7% of women who report low levels of touch are very happy with their lives. In contrast, 22% of women who report high levels of touch are very happy.”
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